This is going to be painful

I've now plowed through 92 (minus chapter one, which I listened to on tape) of Twilight. I found one good line, and it's sandwiched in between two mood shifts and it doesn't even feel like it fits the character. And, re-reading it, even it could be improved. Basically, Bella is complaining that Edward appears right before her, and he says, "Bella, it's not my fault if you are exceptionally unobservant." A line that would be better if you switched the 'if' for a 'that' and if the line was being said by an older, cynical, sarcastically funny man instead of a whiny emo teenager with mood shifts every 2.3 seconds. But then, I'm not a 13 year-old girl and find nothing remotely interesting about a teenage boy, no matter how beautiful and sparkly. Oh, god, it's like Leonardo DiCaprio all over again! I never understood the fuss, and I was younger then...

Other than that, I have never been so glad of my ability to read fast - reading it (that is, letting my eyes skim over the worst bits) is infinitely less painful than listening to it on tape. And at least I haven't invested much time in it. I really want to stop, because I care nothing about the characters, but I'm afraid penchaft would e-smack me. Misery loves company and all, you know. But really, all the 'you should stay away from me for your own good, let's be friends!' malarkey is not only annoying, but it'll give you whiplash. There's mysterious and intriguing, and then there's just stupid and annoying. Guess which category I think this fall in?

And here's a parody someone posted a link to at bookish. If you want to be truly terrified of the rabid Twilighters, read some of those comments... O.o

The only thing that's saving me from sporking my eyes out (not a insubstantial threat, I do own a titanium spork) is that I'm (finally) listening to Charlaine Harris's Dead Until Dark and am enjoying it. Fun vampire fiction neutralizing emo dreck, yes?