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Slap-dash movie review - Silent Hill
I had this movie in my library queue for over a year - close to a year and a half, in fact. I'm glad I was patient instead of buying it, because it would have been money wasted. The chances of me ever wanting to watch it again are slim to none. And closer to none.
In horror movies, there are several different rating factors. Sadly, the only one this rated highly in is the one you don't want to: the cheese factor. Mediocre acting, boring and unrealistic special effects, some hard-to-hear (perhaps mercifully) dialogue and over-the-top 'mood music' are enough to render this movie nearly unwatchable. Plus the overall darkness of most of the scenes (a trend in horror movies these days, I suspect to cut back on special effects budgets) means that even if you watch the movie in the dark you're still squinting at the screen.
I found it sadly lacking in plot (okay, it had one, but not a good one - it was trite and recycled) and with almost no suspense to speak of. I didn't care what happened to the characters. At one point I was willing to off the main character myself if it'd just stop her shouting. Of course, this could be because the sound swung wildly from barely audible to bursting your eardrums. It had a few moments that might have made you jump, were I not overwhelmed with apathy (for instance, the scene with the nurse corpses would have been jumpy, except I spent the time thinking how much it would have improved the movie if they'd busted out into the Thriller song and dance). It had no lasting, nightmare-giving spook effect (though I admit to being a hard-core horror movie veteran, it would take a lot).
I was even willing to give it credit in that it lacked the gratuitous gore that movie-makers now think is a good substitute for real horror, but then the end of the movie was showers of blood and unnecessary gore, which added nothing and took away any brownie points it may have earned in that arena.
The only redeeming factor in the entire movie was the very end. I'll give it a little credit there for not taking the easy route and leaving you with a little lingering air of mystery. But that wasn't enough to even come close to tipping the scales against the mountain of badness that had accumulated. Bottom line, on a scale of one to five popcorn bags this movie rates a fossilized chunk of popcorn you find under your couch.
I had this movie in my library queue for over a year - close to a year and a half, in fact. I'm glad I was patient instead of buying it, because it would have been money wasted. The chances of me ever wanting to watch it again are slim to none. And closer to none.
In horror movies, there are several different rating factors. Sadly, the only one this rated highly in is the one you don't want to: the cheese factor. Mediocre acting, boring and unrealistic special effects, some hard-to-hear (perhaps mercifully) dialogue and over-the-top 'mood music' are enough to render this movie nearly unwatchable. Plus the overall darkness of most of the scenes (a trend in horror movies these days, I suspect to cut back on special effects budgets) means that even if you watch the movie in the dark you're still squinting at the screen.
I found it sadly lacking in plot (okay, it had one, but not a good one - it was trite and recycled) and with almost no suspense to speak of. I didn't care what happened to the characters. At one point I was willing to off the main character myself if it'd just stop her shouting. Of course, this could be because the sound swung wildly from barely audible to bursting your eardrums. It had a few moments that might have made you jump, were I not overwhelmed with apathy (for instance, the scene with the nurse corpses would have been jumpy, except I spent the time thinking how much it would have improved the movie if they'd busted out into the Thriller song and dance). It had no lasting, nightmare-giving spook effect (though I admit to being a hard-core horror movie veteran, it would take a lot).
I was even willing to give it credit in that it lacked the gratuitous gore that movie-makers now think is a good substitute for real horror, but then the end of the movie was showers of blood and unnecessary gore, which added nothing and took away any brownie points it may have earned in that arena.
The only redeeming factor in the entire movie was the very end. I'll give it a little credit there for not taking the easy route and leaving you with a little lingering air of mystery. But that wasn't enough to even come close to tipping the scales against the mountain of badness that had accumulated. Bottom line, on a scale of one to five popcorn bags this movie rates a fossilized chunk of popcorn you find under your couch.