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Late, but here! These are three of the drabbles I owe ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
penchaft for Snerfflebarglast. I'm *almost* done with everything I promised! Wheee!
gelsey, revoked_soul, and a_l_p_h_a_b_e_t, I mailed your fishbowl quilt kit today. You'll need to buy some fabrid to make it, but the hard part (finding 20 unique fish fabrics) is done for you. I hope my instructions are clear, if not, let me know and I'll try to answer any questions you have.
Other good news, I heard from someone whose lumpy card went through the mail just fine, so I'm feeling better about those.
And now: Drabble-y things. (not my best work, I admit)
Prompt: When Punctuations Attack…
“I just want you to know it’s not my fault! I tried to stop them, to tell them that you’re not bad, you just make occasional mistakes… but they found your IM records, and there was no stopping them.” Andrea shivered delicately. “They are furious.”
“Who?”
“Them.” Andrea pointed a shaking finger at the corner of the room. Jen squinted, and out of the darkness she saw figures appearing. Smokey and indistinct at first, then solidifying into human-sized punctuation.
“What is that?” Jen shrieked. The question mark was the first to reach her, and it latched on and began pummeling her with its dot. The little ball at the bottom lashed out like crazed tetherball and bashed her in the side of the head. She slumped over in her chair, unconscious.
“Now we will right the wrongs that have been done to us in this world!” exclaimed the exclamation mark.
“Will you try to stop us?” queried the question mark.
“No. There’s nothing I can do to stop you, and while I disagree with your methods, I have to acknowledge that you have been wronged.” Andrea rushed towards Jen’s unmoving form.
“Thank you. That’s all we can ask.” said the period.
A long line of various forms of punctuation trooped out the door, leaving a stunned Andrea kneeling by Jen. The semi-colon looked back for a brief moment, then shrugged and followed the rest out the door.
“Jen, Jen! Are you okay?” Andrea shook her lightly. Jen groaned, and opened her eyes.
what did you do what is that what happened why do I sound funny me head hurts oh god whats wrong with me Jen asked
“I’m so sorry,” Andrea sobbed. “They… they took away your punctuation. They said it was punishment for misusing it. I tried to stop them, but… but… I couldn’t.”
But youre still fine why are you so fine because youre some grammar nazi and they think what that youre worthy or some crap like that is that what this is all about Jen said angrily
“Well, yes, they appreciated my proper use of punctuation and the fact that I encouraged others to do so. But I don’t agree with what they’re doing, you know me, there has to be a peaceful solution.” Andrea smiled thinly.
Jen simply glared at her.
Prompt: Cheesecake vs. Trifle
The Battle of the Bulge
(SWEN news wire, 12-20-07)
“Presenting! The epic fight of the century! You asked for it, now’s your chance to get ring-side seats for the event of a lifetime!”
You’ve seen the enigmatic posters all around town, promising… well, no one knows! Surprisingly, over 12,000 tickets have already been sold for this event, despite the main event being so very hush-hush. But we here at SWEN are going to let you in on the secret – and if you want tickets, you’d better act fast. Because once the word is out, these tickets are going to be impossible to get!
Cheesecake, the three-time champion and legend, has come out of retirement for one fight and one fight only. He’ll take on the young, unproven upstart, Trifle. Vegas odds have Cheesecake as only a slim favorite, despite the fact that Trifle has never proven himself against a worthy opponent.
“Cheesecake is old,” one bookie – who wished to remain anonymous – said. “He’s slowed down, and even though Trifle hasn’t been in a lot of fights his speed and agility are quite apparent. The only question is whether he’ll have the strength needed for a knockout.”
The allegations of cheating and fat injections are flying, as well as a vicious smear campaign headed by the Council for Healthier Living Through Not Stuffing Your Gaping Pie-Hole With Crap. We tried to get in touch with their office, but there was no response to our repeated request for an interview. Perhaps we shouldn’t have shown up with a Greasy McGreaseburger bag.
Prompt: How Indie is too inhuman?
“What are we doing here?” Jessica whispered, crouching low behind a stack of crates.
“Investigating,” Matt said. “That’s what journalists do.”
“Yes, but why are we doing it? Do you honestly believe that if you bring Chad a story he’s going to promote you out of the mail room and into a journalist spot? You’ve been watching too many movies.”
“Shhhh. Here they come.”
“What are we looking for again?” Jessica peered cautiously around the corner, but saw nothing interesting about the cargo van that had pulled up and spit out a group of four tattered looking guys.
“Toxic Megacolon* went from a nothing metal band to an ‘indie’ sensation overnight. They… changed. Not so much that it was suspicious, but there was something… odd about it. I’d seen these guys play clubs back in the old days, and they’re not the same people. What happened to them?” Matt pulled out a small pocket-sized camera and snapped a few pictures.
“They wanted to be successful? They are now THE epitome of an Indie band – everyone wants to be them. How is that wrong?”
“Giraffes don’t change their spots,” Matt said grimly.
“Leopards.”
“What?”
“The saying is that a leopard doesn’t change its spots.”
“Whatever.”
They both peeked around the corner of the crates, watching the band horse around in the deserted warehouse parking lot. Another van pulled up, and Matt and Jessica watched in fascinated horror as a group of shimmery, blob-like beings stepped out of the back. They were too far away to hear what they were saying, but they saw everything that happened clearly. The band members unzipped their skins and stepped out of them, showing their true form – shimmery, blob-like beings. They tossed the skins to the new arrivals, who slipped them on and zipped up. Then they got back into their vans and drove off.
“Well,” Matt said slowly. “I guess that explains a lot.”
*band name credit toelaran
penchaft for Snerfflebarglast. I'm *almost* done with everything I promised! Wheee!gelsey, revoked_soul, and a_l_p_h_a_b_e_t, I mailed your fishbowl quilt kit today. You'll need to buy some fabrid to make it, but the hard part (finding 20 unique fish fabrics) is done for you. I hope my instructions are clear, if not, let me know and I'll try to answer any questions you have.Other good news, I heard from someone whose lumpy card went through the mail just fine, so I'm feeling better about those.
And now: Drabble-y things. (not my best work, I admit)
Prompt: When Punctuations Attack…
“I just want you to know it’s not my fault! I tried to stop them, to tell them that you’re not bad, you just make occasional mistakes… but they found your IM records, and there was no stopping them.” Andrea shivered delicately. “They are furious.”
“Who?”
“Them.” Andrea pointed a shaking finger at the corner of the room. Jen squinted, and out of the darkness she saw figures appearing. Smokey and indistinct at first, then solidifying into human-sized punctuation.
“What is that?” Jen shrieked. The question mark was the first to reach her, and it latched on and began pummeling her with its dot. The little ball at the bottom lashed out like crazed tetherball and bashed her in the side of the head. She slumped over in her chair, unconscious.
“Now we will right the wrongs that have been done to us in this world!” exclaimed the exclamation mark.
“Will you try to stop us?” queried the question mark.
“No. There’s nothing I can do to stop you, and while I disagree with your methods, I have to acknowledge that you have been wronged.” Andrea rushed towards Jen’s unmoving form.
“Thank you. That’s all we can ask.” said the period.
A long line of various forms of punctuation trooped out the door, leaving a stunned Andrea kneeling by Jen. The semi-colon looked back for a brief moment, then shrugged and followed the rest out the door.
“Jen, Jen! Are you okay?” Andrea shook her lightly. Jen groaned, and opened her eyes.
what did you do what is that what happened why do I sound funny me head hurts oh god whats wrong with me Jen asked
“I’m so sorry,” Andrea sobbed. “They… they took away your punctuation. They said it was punishment for misusing it. I tried to stop them, but… but… I couldn’t.”
But youre still fine why are you so fine because youre some grammar nazi and they think what that youre worthy or some crap like that is that what this is all about Jen said angrily
“Well, yes, they appreciated my proper use of punctuation and the fact that I encouraged others to do so. But I don’t agree with what they’re doing, you know me, there has to be a peaceful solution.” Andrea smiled thinly.
Jen simply glared at her.
Prompt: Cheesecake vs. Trifle
The Battle of the Bulge
(SWEN news wire, 12-20-07)
You’ve seen the enigmatic posters all around town, promising… well, no one knows! Surprisingly, over 12,000 tickets have already been sold for this event, despite the main event being so very hush-hush. But we here at SWEN are going to let you in on the secret – and if you want tickets, you’d better act fast. Because once the word is out, these tickets are going to be impossible to get!
Cheesecake, the three-time champion and legend, has come out of retirement for one fight and one fight only. He’ll take on the young, unproven upstart, Trifle. Vegas odds have Cheesecake as only a slim favorite, despite the fact that Trifle has never proven himself against a worthy opponent.
“Cheesecake is old,” one bookie – who wished to remain anonymous – said. “He’s slowed down, and even though Trifle hasn’t been in a lot of fights his speed and agility are quite apparent. The only question is whether he’ll have the strength needed for a knockout.”
The allegations of cheating and fat injections are flying, as well as a vicious smear campaign headed by the Council for Healthier Living Through Not Stuffing Your Gaping Pie-Hole With Crap. We tried to get in touch with their office, but there was no response to our repeated request for an interview. Perhaps we shouldn’t have shown up with a Greasy McGreaseburger bag.
Prompt: How Indie is too inhuman?
“What are we doing here?” Jessica whispered, crouching low behind a stack of crates.
“Investigating,” Matt said. “That’s what journalists do.”
“Yes, but why are we doing it? Do you honestly believe that if you bring Chad a story he’s going to promote you out of the mail room and into a journalist spot? You’ve been watching too many movies.”
“Shhhh. Here they come.”
“What are we looking for again?” Jessica peered cautiously around the corner, but saw nothing interesting about the cargo van that had pulled up and spit out a group of four tattered looking guys.
“Toxic Megacolon* went from a nothing metal band to an ‘indie’ sensation overnight. They… changed. Not so much that it was suspicious, but there was something… odd about it. I’d seen these guys play clubs back in the old days, and they’re not the same people. What happened to them?” Matt pulled out a small pocket-sized camera and snapped a few pictures.
“They wanted to be successful? They are now THE epitome of an Indie band – everyone wants to be them. How is that wrong?”
“Giraffes don’t change their spots,” Matt said grimly.
“Leopards.”
“What?”
“The saying is that a leopard doesn’t change its spots.”
“Whatever.”
They both peeked around the corner of the crates, watching the band horse around in the deserted warehouse parking lot. Another van pulled up, and Matt and Jessica watched in fascinated horror as a group of shimmery, blob-like beings stepped out of the back. They were too far away to hear what they were saying, but they saw everything that happened clearly. The band members unzipped their skins and stepped out of them, showing their true form – shimmery, blob-like beings. They tossed the skins to the new arrivals, who slipped them on and zipped up. Then they got back into their vans and drove off.
“Well,” Matt said slowly. “I guess that explains a lot.”
*band name credit to
elaran
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Also: that punctuation bit cracked me up. There are a few people out there who are just BEGGING for that to happen.
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How about something like "The period nodded"?
I love them like chocolate! =3
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Also, I declare today a national holiday! It's Shakespeare In The Mail day!
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I'm glad you like them! I have ideas for the other two, as well as for your Christmas present one, maybe I can work on them tomorrow... (not the Christmas one, that will require me being at home...)
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YAY! I'm guessing I found the right list, then! (I was totally going to get you something more fun, but none of our bookstores had any of the really cool ones in stock. I did, however, note quite a few of them that I was interested in. And I didn't want to get something too mainstream, figuring you might get those from someone else...)
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Some people bash Wal-Mart's fabric, saying it's not as good as a quilting store's (and no, Joann's doesn't count as a 'quilting store', either!) but I say for $2 a yard I'm happy. Those quilting stores charge $8-$10 for the same (though they claim it's not) fabric. You have more choices at a specialized store, but still!
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Nobody else ever buys me things from my Amazon wishlist ;.; Well, I think my parents have once or twice...